It’s Easter Sunday morning and I’m making brownies to take to friends. These brownies are the most decadent – full of butter, sugar and of course a lot of chocolate…all of the things they say we should eat in moderation. I firmly believe that they are good for you! I rarely get a chance to make anything else – people keep asking for these (as an aside, the second batch may not have worked so….they rarely fail but it does happen!).
Why do I believe they are good – I make them with love. It nourishes me to do things like this for the people I care about. Nourishing is something I’ve been focusing on a lot this last week…thinking about what nourishes me, what feeds my soul and makes me happy. And what doesn’t!
Thinking about this is what stopped me contemplating going to work most of the six days we have off over Easter. I was seriously thinking about it. I’m not sure what really stopped me. I think it was a series of little things. My mood this week has been low, I’ve been looking for distraction and I have not been looking after myself. So I decided to have a few days off…rest, think, nourish myself with sleep, time with friends, good food, time alone.
It would be ridiculously easy for me to keep pushing on and let work take over my life at the moment. But I know I am about to hit the wall hard if I do. And that’s not going to get anything done if I collapse in a heap. The women in leadership course I am doing asked us to stop when doing things and ask ourselves a question – does this give me energy or does it drain me? So that is now what I keep asking myself on this voyage of rediscovery and reshaping my life. What gives me energy and what takes away from it?
Funnily enough, as sociable as I am and as much as being with people gives me energy, I have noticed that I am not giving myself the solitude I need to recharge myself. I spend too much time on Facebook etc instead of using it as the useful tool it is for keeping in touch with friends here and around the world. So it’s time to work out a bit more balance…a bit more of what nourishes me. It’s time to take extremely good care of myself, so that I have enough to keep giving to my friends and family and job.
In line with that, instead of cleaning the house on Good Friday, I slept in, mooched about the house in my pyjamas, caught up on TV, watched a DVD, did my magazine competitions, cuddled the cats and rested. Yesterday I did some housework (having two cats means that changing the bed requires a lot of cat hair removal), laundry, went shopping with a good friend for another good friend’s birthday present, bought myself a coffee mug I really wanted, didn’t buy the $400 vase with the New York skyline on it, visited my neighbour, missed a phone call from my supervisor congratulating me on my PhD being classified. And started to feel like Lesley again!
Now I have made two batches of brownies, am about to shower and head to friends to spoil them with chocolate and brownies, then go and catch up with my sister and her family. Tomorrow…well…I may go to work…or I may clean the house. I haven’t decided yet. I may leave that until Wednesday. And actually let myself have five days off in a row.
What nourishes you?
Happy Easter everyone!